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Amber

[ website | Amber's World ]
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A Bit of An Update [21 Nov 2008|05:30pm]
[ mood | calm ]

Long time no see. I'm sure people will see even less of me now, but I mean that in a good way oddly enough. I went on a bit of a campaign against my own weight a while ago, and overall I've won the battle. I still have parts of myself that I would like to tone up and refine down a bit more, but overall I'm happy with myself. As of today I've made it down to around 160lbs. Even less than last time I went to the DMV and got my license changed. I have few works since I'm sure few people will read through this anymore, but I thought it would be nice to at least direct a few thoughts outwards to any who might be inclined to know of such things.

[IMG]http://i34.tinypic.com/117gqdg.jpg[/IMG]


Dressing up is still fun. ^_^ 

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Where I've been Most of the time Now [26 Feb 2006|01:01am]
[ mood | sleepy ]

Gaia Online anime roleplaying community

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Quiz of the Night [08 May 2005|11:00pm]
Contradiction
F:

Your Beauty lies
in Contradiction. Controversial, unpredictable, and
never what anyone expects.
You appearance and your personality are two
opposite things. Even your
appearance sends different signals to different
people. To some you may look
innocent and sweet, to others you look mysterious
and intimidating at the same
time. No one ever knows what to expect with you.
You are a little bit of
everything all mixed together. You can be watching
the football game with the
guys one minute and the next out shopping at the
mall. You seem to be almost a
different person every time you meet someone, but
at the same time you know
exactly who you are and there is always that one
thing that makes you you. You
enjoy keeping people guessing and people love how
completely unpredictable you
are.



Some Things
That Represent You:



Element:
Fire, Water Animal: Chameleon Color:
Dark Tones, Light
Tones Song: Everything by Alanis Morriesette
Expression:
Half-smile



Gemstone:
Opal Mythological Creature: Gryphon,
Half-breeds Planet: Mars Hair
Color:
Red Eye Color:
Brown



Quote:
"Appearances can be deceiving."




Where Does Your Beauty Lie? ..::Original Pictures Are Back! Detailed Results::..
brought to you by Quizilla</
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Last One For the night [07 May 2005|01:27am]
[ mood | thoughtful ]

Rain
Your element is Rain: Sad, lonely, distant and
unique. You are quite distant from emotion and
people, but you have been made this way by one
thing or another. You are truly unique yet fail
to see it, and are quite creative be it in art,
music, writing, ect.. You used to let people in
now you don't even bother to try having been
hurt so many times in the past. Your attitude
is that you don't need anyone but yourself,
people are just trouble waiting to happen. But
you really do want to trust someone no matter
if you see it or not, deep down your waiting
for someone to come and set you free. This kind
of depression can turn dangerous, don't let
them get to you. Not everyone in the world will
hurt you, humans are humans and are not
perfect. So most likely sooner or later you'll
meet someone who feels like you do and perhaps
your shell will eventually disappear.


.:-|What is your true element?|-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by Quizilla

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Quizing A bit At the Moment [07 May 2005|12:50am]
[ mood | impressed ]

mermaid
You are a Mermaid, who sits on a rock in
the sea, looking and watching all humanity with
curiosity in your eyes. You have a two-sided
personality! On one hand, you revel in your
freedom and often prefer to live in your own
private dreams.

On the other hand, humanity
intrigues you and you love watching on. You are
actually very kind at heart, hating to see
people hurt and despise injustice! You probably
have one or two special friends, who mean the
world to you!

Also; you are probably quite
political, wanting to see justice done in the
world.

You are quite the dreamer, needing
freedom and personal space to dream your little
dreams. You love to escape into a book or some
good music and just drift away.

Some of your
good points are that you are sensitive,
compassionate and a freethinker. Your bad
points are that you may come across as cool and
aloof to others and probably have a tendency to
depression!

You are the ultimate dreamer with
a kind, but troubled heart!


Are you a Princess, Enchantress, Faerie, Mermaid or Toad? (with pictures!)
brought to you by Quizilla

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Does anyone besides me find this scary and wrong? [07 May 2005|12:38am]
[ mood | confused ]

You scored as You are truly Black. Holla! You is truly a black mofo! Get yo ass in a do-rag and busta rap homie!

</td>

You are truly Black

75%

You are truly Asian

63%

You are Truly Jewish

50%

You are truly a Mexican

25%

You are truly White

13%

What's your true race
created with QuizFarm.com
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Finally Finished [07 May 2005|12:32am]
HalfElf
Half-Elf: You are caught between two worlds and
feel like no one else can quite understand your
situation. Youve tried many times to express
your feelings in song or prose to covey just
how the situation makes you feel, but you cant
help but feel it is all for naught. You shall
outlive your human kin, but you are young yet
by elven standards. You live between the two
societies, never fully a part of either. Those
you trust and call friend you guard well from
harm. Sometimes they feel like the only family
you truly possess.


Which Standard Dungeons and Dragons Race Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
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Perhaps a Few Glimers for Only a few [06 May 2005|01:22am]
[ mood | pensive ]

I've come the conclusion that my prior policy of keeping my posts guarded from most was a better way to go about things. Less rude comments from people came to my journal when I kept my secrets more carefully hidden, and so I suppose I shall simply have to revert back to my normal mode of keeping things from all but a select few. This may be my last public entry for a while. *shrug*

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INTERNET [05 May 2005|07:13pm]
[ mood | bouncy ]

YAY!!! Cable for me. A slightly early b-day present to myself. ^________^

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Quick Survery [28 Apr 2005|11:58am]
[ mood | curious ]

Okay everyone who is out there and actually reads this thing, I've only got about a day left, so quick question : Which do you think is more important, internet connection or a phone line? Okay, please tell me which one ya think it really is. Thanks.

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Ignorant People [28 Apr 2005|11:56am]
[ mood | annoyed ]

One of my coworkers got to me last night. She was asking about adopting an animal from the shelter, but when I told her that they microchip all the animals that come out of the shelter she had herself a little hissyfit like it was such a cruel thing to do to an animal, even though it's a state law that all animals that come out of the shelter have to be microchiped. It's no worse than giving them a shot really, but I suppose I'm a bit more used to things. All well. Just a random thought.

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Yay! Limited AIM [27 Apr 2005|12:37pm]
[ mood | chipper ]

Disabled pop up blocker for AIM express. That is a good think. That means I could actually talk to people (if they where actually on in the morning....yeah right) Without downloading software and pissing off my dad. ^_^*** Just like highschool....go figure. All well. Not going to be down today. I told myself I would at least try to keep my spirits high, and my protein levels too. Fainting is a bad think, and doctors not giving you a straight answer about what happened to you last time even after a ton of tests is worse. Blah, stupid doctor. Anyways...ever since then when I'm shaky I eat some meat, cause I was shaky before I passed out oh so long ago, and it did coincide with when I had my bloody time. Yah....More info than most people wanted I'm sure, but all well. =Þ If your reading this, might as well find out something ya didn't really want to know.

Now why again did I want AIM up? Everyone else is gone...it's not night time when all the fun people are here. *shrug* all well, it's still a small victory! ^_^ *Deep breath* Funny that I have such a large response base to one of the few posts I really didn't think people would pay much attention to. Blah, all well. People just crawl out of the woodwork when they want to rub things in I suppose. One moment of fractured posting equals days of responses. People don't like to hear about all the good things in my life, just the one moment of pain. *shakes my head* All well. I guess that is kindof like the people who like to watch accidents. Morbid curiosity or something. Damn...I should bring Diana's screen name with me tomarrow, then maybe I'll be able to talk to her if she isn't at work or sleeping. ^^* I can cross my fingers at least.
Who would have ever thought I would be listening to things like Techno Rock or hard rock for that matter? I've got NIN "Hand That Bleeds" running through my head. It's got a perky up beat accented by the darker back beat that just kindof catches in your head sometimes I guess. That reminds me in a very round about way, I've had a AMV concept floating through my head for months now, but not the equipment to do so. Now I have the means, and i just need to figure out how to get everything to work the way I need it to. -_-* Go figure. Maybe I'll ask someone from anime club on some advice. In a lot of ways I'm sure it will make Geo happy, but the actual concept and ideas are a secret. =Þ Can't let other people get to it first. *giggle giggle giggle*

Mood swings, mood swings, happy happy mood swings. You know it's bad when an episode of Futurama can make ya cry. It was about Fry's dog, and how he waited for him to come back for 12 years. It was so sad. I felt so bad for the dog, cause Fry has a chance to clone him, and he didn't because he thought that his dog had a full and happy life without him, and didn't want to just bring him back cause he thought the dog didn't even remember him. I cried for a good 5 minutes afterwards. *snuffles*

Also got started on my reminder article about fleas, ticks, and mosquitos. ^^* I might have to polish a bit more before I put it on the board, but I've still got about a week before it's may. I do need to get more flower pictures though, or make some. Yeah, it's a bit cheesy and clique, but I went with the whole April Showers brings May flowers angle. So there are some cute little clouds and rain drops and umbrellas on the board right now, so I really need to kindof counterpoint that this month with the whole flower thing. ^^* I like doing the board though, it gives me a lot of leeway, and the ablity to showcase some of my talents. ^_^ Ambie...showing off. This month has a cute poem I wrote about having an open mind and open heart when it comes to adopting pets. ^^* Too bad I don't have a copy of it with me today or I might even post it here. ^^* Maybe.

Anyways...Life is actually pretty decent. I've started diversifying at work so I don't get board as much, and I have a challenge. They schedual me about once a week now in the mens department, and it seems to be having the desired effect of getting Deb to kindof value me more when I'm on the registers. I could do registers when half asleep though (and have in the past ^^*) They just keep adding more and more things they want us to do. It's like they are trying to stretch us like taffy pieces until we snap. *shrug* I do my best, and that is all that I can do. I make an effort to do everything they ask of me and more. I can't stand just standing around doing nothing at the registers, so of course I'm going to help the departments by folding tables and stuff when I have nothing better to do. They are paying me anyways, I might as well do something to help everyone get to go home that much sooner, right? Wow! Long post. I guess I really haven't written in so long I'm trying to squeeze a whole bunch of things into one little itty bitty post thingy, and I haven't even gone into cat antics. ^^* But...time is running short, so I guess I'll just kindof scram and stuffles.
Maybe I'll get cable and actually be back soon. It's still a tough call between getting cable internet or getting a phone line. The pros and cons are still being weighed out and all that, so the jurry is still out. Anways...take care out there internet land.

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A Quick Glimpse of What Was [25 Apr 2005|12:28pm]
[ mood | sad ]

I find myself here once again, but I see no longer do I have friends. Those who once spoke to me, now lie to my face but here their true feelings I do see. How can I trust those who would twist the knife, when all they ever wish to do is cause me more pain? Why should I bother to remain, or strive to find my way here once again, when so called friends deserted me in word and deed long ago?
Perhaps it sounds melodramatic...but why should I let that bother me right now? Should I even ask why anymore? Forget myself once again, slip into the bliss of forgetfulness. Leave pain where it lies, and try once again to see the light of day. The cycle that does not end, it claims me each time with new fever. Forget those who cause only pain, and slip back into nothingness one last time. Trust no one, they only wound you in the end. The more you tell them, the deeper the pain. Slip away quietly when no one is looking, and lament what could have been. Forgotten, but never completly alone, peer out from your hidden spaces just long enough to see the world passing by. Find solace in tasks that others don't understand. Find self worth in the knowledge that good still comes from helping others. Keeping people at arms length, yet desperatly yearning to talk to others of things that have festered too long. This is the way life has become, this is the chaos left in the wake of what went so terribly wrong.
Does anyone remember who I was? I lost that long ago.

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Well, Out of the Loop, and Not Even Remebered It Seems [04 Apr 2004|06:31pm]
[ mood | sad ]

Peeked over at tonya's LJ to notice Tim is doing his game, nice to invite me...really...thanks....~_~ I guess I'm just not considered to be even worth considering to ask to play anymore. ¬¬ Well, whatever. Fine, it seems I have been abandoned by most. *Sigh*

In other news, I really dislike when certain people snoop in my room while I'm gone. You know who you are, don't do it again.

I just feel a bit hurt right now. "Always on the outside looking in, never able to find a true friend, always at the edges of the universe, that is my pain, that is my curse"
Hmph, fair weather friends. To dust off an old poem I had hoped I would not need to remember, nor use again to describe how I feel...

"Fair Weather Friends
Fair weather friends
That hide away at the first sign of trouble
I have had too many of them
So when true friends appear I fumble

I try to find the words
To tell them how I feel
I wonder to myself
If they're even real

Fair weather friends
Left me high and dry
When things came down to it
They simply said "Bye"

So now I have to wonder
If my friends are true
Of if like fair weather friends
There is nothing they would do

Friends of old, let me fall
Into the void, and let me die
"Don't look back, just go away
Leave me alone", I silently cry

Mourning the loss of those who never cared
Tears of pain and hate where shead that day
but now my eyes refuse to cry
Haven't shed a tear since that day in May

My grief is instead balled up in my heart
A very silent part
Of what I used to be
Staying forver with me"

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Hmm [09 Mar 2004|10:16am]
[ mood | contemplative ]

I find that now that I have the time to be here, I really have very little to no real desire to do so. Yes, I do miss talking to some of the people I cared about when I used to live online, but I find that living itself can be a lot more enjoyable than staring at a computer screen for long periods of time, waiting for somone I know to come online. Strange, isn't it? I used to spend a good portion of my life here for the longerst time, and now I barely even miss it other than talking to a few select people who made life better.

Well, *soft smile* I suppose I will be around like a fading memory, but I don't intend to linger overly long. It just doesn't sound much like fun. I hope everyone I used to know, who still reads this takes care. ^_^

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A Quick Quiz [09 Mar 2004|10:15am]
[ mood | contemplative ]

Angel
You are one of the few out there whose wings are
truly ANGELIC. Selfless, powerful, and
divine, you are one blessed with a certain
cosmic grace. You are unequalled in
peacefulness, love, and beauty. As a Being of
Light your wings are massive and a soft white
or silver. Countless feathers grace them and
radiate the light within you for all the world
to see. You are a defender, protector, and
caretaker. Comforter of the weak and forgiver
of the wrong, chances are you are taken
advantage of once in awhile, maybe quite often.
But your innocence and wisdom sees the good in
everyone and so this mistreatment does not make
you colder. Merciful to the extreme, you will
try to help misguided souls find themselves and
peace. However not all Angelics allow
themselves to be gotten the better of - the
Seraphim for example will be driven to fighting
for the sake of Justice and protection of those
less powerful. Congratulations - and don't ever
change - the world needs more people like you.


*~*~*Claim Your Wings - Pics and Long Answers*~*~*
brought to you by Quizilla

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And now.... [01 Mar 2004|11:12am]
[ mood | restless ]

...for a real update.

Okay, I haven't really been online or in the computer all that much as of late, so I haven't had a chance to really read friends posts, or do much of anything compy related. I'm here today, and for the next two weeks Tuffy sitting. Otherwise I would be over at Kevin's playing video games, reading, or doing something else to bide my time till he got back from work. ^^*

Um...yeah. Anyways, sorry I've been so out of the internet loop lately, (for anyone who misses me) I have a lot going on in my life, most of it I would rather not post publically right now. ^^* I am working on figuring out who I am, and that can be a long long process.

In lighter news, I have to clean my room while I"m back, -_-* but at least I don't have to go to the laudery mat to clean my cloths. Also I got the Sailor Moon R uncut box set. *Dansu* Um, I'm working on playing the last game in the .hack series, .hack/quarentine and I got a copy of FFX of my very own so I can restart the game all over again (Rocky deleted my file ~_~) and play it. ^^* I missed FFX for some odd reason. Also I'm level 99 in FF Tactics, and getting close to beating that game. I read a really good book on japanese tales, and I"m working on two books right now. One is on a bunch of different world myths, the other on fairies. ^^* Um, I still need to find a better job, and I really don't think I have much else to say right now, so I guess I'll wrap this coment up and get back to this when I have more to say on things.

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Well....Since they don't have electic pagan ^^* [01 Mar 2004|11:11am]
[ mood | awake ]

Wicca Result
You are Wiccan. Calm and peacful, you are in tune
with nature. You cast spells to cure people,
and will never hurt a living thing. You are
skilled at just about everything. Now go
purify that new Athame. WICCA


What religion does your personality match up to?
brought to you by Quizilla

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New Job [05 Jan 2004|09:31pm]
[ mood | tired ]

New...job...sucking away...free time...and will to live.....*Dies* Okay...sorry but I barely even see this compy anymore, much less use it, so i guess I'm just kindof inaccessible right now. *drones*Must sell knives....Must sell knives...
Actually it's not as bad as some sales jobs, so I can't complain too much, I"m just running out of people ta do presentations for...-_-* Oh well, time to go visit the happy temp agency and see if I can get hooked up with a clerical position instead. *Dies*

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My heart is back [16 Dec 2003|11:38am]
[ mood | indescribable ]

Take that announcement as you will.

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